I know advertising is necessary but sometimes I just feel the need to make fun of it.
I was listening to TV and noticed how many commercials there were. I wondered “who do they think I am?”
So here’s me based on one 15 minute period of TV:
Because of my age I might have high cholesterol but Crestor will help.
I should go on an expedition to the Amazon in case I die of high cholesterol.
I might need to sign up for Oregon Healthcare.
I will save lots of money if I buy new sweaters from Ross’ (although I doubt I’ll need them in the amazon).
New furniture from Ikea will beautify my home (but I’ll need to throw some out to make room for it).
My financial situation will improve if I get a Capital One credit card.
I can eat more great big juicy burgers from Red Robins because I am on Crestor.
I need Rolaids.
Progressive will insure everything in my life and relieve me of all my worries.
If I am not careful I will miss the most entertaining TV sit-coms.
My car will stay beautiful and keep its value if I take it in to Maaco every time I get the smallest dent or scratch.
Going to the local RV Show will help me make that important decision on how to enjoy my new credit card to its fullest extent.
I should really check into Oregon Healthcare.
If I buy Johnsonville Brats I need to buy enough for lots of friends and neighbors who will come when they smell them on the grill.
My family will interact more if we use Xfinity.
I need to fix the other dent in my car – take it to Maaco.
The TV news people really care about me. I should watch the news later.
I should shop for clothes at JCP weekly so I don’t miss their great deals. (I may need to empty my closet, first, to make room.)